It has been brought to my attention by some that I have been very behind in my updates. I can't seem to sleep tonight so here's what i've got.

It is the Christmas Season, with less than 2 weeks before the Jolly man in red should arrive I am not feeling very festive or merry, but think I should actually pick up some presents for the kids...

Sebastian was again admitted into Canuck Place Hospice for a deterioration in his breathing. Since arriving last weekend most days he has changed a bit and gotten worse. He is very well medicated, with both morphine and fentanyl and is, in the most part comfortable. I had not really thought, or possibly tried not to think about what was really going on till I was talking to one of our favorite nurses yesterday afternoon and she said that our stay has been extended till?? Then in the evening with Sebastian breathing and on his 6 litres of oxygen his sat's hovering in the 50's his night nurse telling me what a great life he has had and how tired and grey he is looking. He has been going downhill for some time now and his body is fighting so hard we are very unsure what this festive holiday season will bring. I do know, though, that Stel has taken the next couple days off work to spend some more time.